Category Archives: I couldn’t imagine life without “A grandmother’s love”

These blog posts are about the tender memories of my dear sweet grandmother as I was growing up. My grandmother was the sweetest, purest soul I ever had the pleasure of knowing. She was stern, faithful, loving, fire cracker of a woman. She had a very hard life as a young woman which shaped and molded her into the woman she would become in her later years. I thank God everyday for her loving kindness….

One of my favorite memories; The sound of my Grandmother’s voice


So tonight, I was wondering what am I going to write about and I came across a post on facebook about the “Grandmother’s Apron”  and it inspired me and brought me back to my days of childhood and my dear sweet Grandmother Ida.  I normally try to do my posts without names, I don’t know why, I guess to be a little more intriguing but, I felt tonight that I wanted to honor my grandmother…..

I remember coming in from school and opening the gate, I could hear my Grandma Ida in the kitchen cooking, washing dishes and singing hymns….” Amazing grace, how sweet the sound that saved a wretch like me…… When I would come in she would stop singing and ask how my day was.  She would continue moving throughout the kitchen preparing a meal fit for a king.  Chopping onions, garlic and the like, browning them, adding ground meat and making a gravy to put over mashed potatoes.  All made from scratch, you didn’t find much packaged foods in her kitchen, no sir re, she took pride in cooking for her family.  She had this blue half apron that she wore for years, it seems like that’s the only one I ever remember her wearing.  If it would get a tear, she would stitch it up and go on about her way.  I sit back and think now how happy she was with the little that she had, she was very grateful and had pride like no other.  My dear sweet Grandmother is the best grandmother in the whole world, she set not only a womanly example for us, she set a Godly example for us; always bringing us to church, teaching us to read our bible daily and the like.

That apron helped my Grandmother prepare many a meal for me, my brother, sisters, uncles, aunt and my mom and dad.  She used it as a towel to dry her hands, as a hot pad to move skillets on the stove, to wipe up spills, to wipe our faces and so much more.  I look back and think how can something so simple as an apron hold so many memories, how can something as simple as an apron be such an important part of who someone is, how can something as simple as an apron do so many important things?  I tell you how, because the woman that wore that apron was doing what she absolutely loved, cooking and cleaning and taking care of her family and that simple apron helped her to do it.  That apron made her job just a little bit easier.

I oft remaniss in the fragrant memories of the sound of my grandmother’s voice, I find myself standing at the kitchen window coming in from school and hearing that heavenly sound coming through the air….the sound of my grandmother in the kitchen preparing dinner and singing hymns…..

Granny I know you are up in Heaven watching over us, I hope you know how proud we are to have you for our Grandmother, you were an inspiration to all of us.  Fly high with the angels, all my love, till we meet again!

Crystal Hoksbergen


The angels delivered the news rejoicing with joy; The baby is coming, the baby is coming!

  My Mother

Oh, how exciting, “We’re going to have a baby!” Everyone was so happy when they heard the news that there was going to be a new baby in the family.  This baby was so loved before she was even born.  Oh, the excitement, the preparation began, baby showers and the like.  A baby is coming, a baby is coming!  The family hurried to get everything together, everything had to be just perfect.

There was one thing missing, one big thing missing throughout the entire celebration,  my Grandmother Eula.  You see my grandmother was in the nursing home, she was not well, she did not know anyone.  My mom was devastated because she longed to have her mother by her side through this exciting time in her life, to share the joy and laughter.  My mom went to the nursing home when she found out that she was pregnant and she tried to tell her mother that she was going to have a baby.  My grandmother did not understand, it pained my mother so.  She wept by her mother’s bedside crying, longing to hear her mother’s reply when she found out that I was coming.   My mother left the nursing home devastated and feeling so alone.

My mother went home and knelt beside her bed and cried out God please tell my mother that I am going to have a baby.  Tell her that she is going to be a grandmother.  Lord, I need my mother to know, she just must know.

Well the next time that my mother went to the nursing home, one of the nurses stopped her and asked her “Are you going to have a baby?” and my mom said “Why yes I am, how did you know?” and the nurse said “Your mom has been singing all morning, “I’m gonna be a grandmother, I’m gonna be a grandmother!”  My mother’s prayers were answered!  The angels delivered the news, just as my mom requested!  The halls were filled with love, with peace with resounding  joy as all the nurses and residents heard the news!  The anticipation of the coming baby spread over the entire place!

It’s time, the baby is coming, the baby is coming!!  The rest of this story is finished by my dear sweet Aunt Nita by a facebook post that she shared on my page for my birthday just the other day.  Don’t think she saw this one coming.

Oh my Crystal! I’m so sorry I’m late with your Birthday wishes! I thought of you many times yesterday but every time I headed toward the computer I got distracted! So Happy Birthday from the bottom of my heart! I hope your day was grand!…….And I don’t know if I’ve ever told you, but every birthday since you were born, I find myself going back to when we finally got the news that you were an adorable little girl! My heart just leaped for joy and I ran through the neighborhood letting everyone know “It’s a girl”! I hadn’t even seen you yet and I couldn’t wait for you to come home from the hospital! And after what seemed like an eternity, I finally saw you for the first time! You were the most beautiful baby I had ever seen, and in that moment I felt a special kind of love for you like none I’ve ever known! And from that day to this one, I’ve loved you more every day! You were indeed the sweetest blessing that God could have given us! And you’ve been a blessing to us ever since! Always know that I love you and there is an extra special place in my heart! Happy Birthday!

Thank you Lord for blessing me with such a wonderful family, thank you for telling my Grandmother Eula the news that I was coming, I’ve oft reminisced about this story and it just warmed my heart to know that she knew that I was coming even though she was going through so much.  I feel like it connected me with her at some level.  I never got to know her because she passed to go on with you when I was but 2 years old.  Even still she is very special and will always hold a place in my heart.

My grandma’s house–The house that built me

Thinking back tonight about the fragrant memories of the house that built me.  To look at it it’s not much, and it may not mean anything to most people but, to me it’s the house that built me.  Looking back into my childhood I see how my dear sweet grandmother would care for me, my brother and my sisters with such love in that house.  I see her cooking our meals, washing our clothes, taking care of us when we were sick, teaching us to pray, to read the bible and so much more. Grandma Ida always had kids in her house, she was always taking care of someone and that was her mission in life.  She loved us kids like no other.

That house holds so much love, faith and pain all at the same time, if that makes sense.  You see my Grandfather built the house from a campboat that he had bought, he added on to it and made it a home.  He was a fisherman and did not have much money so he used what he had.  My grandfather was not the kindest family man, he was an alcoholic and it got the best of him many a day.  My grandmother finally got enough of it and they separated.  She stayed in the house and as a young man my dad took on the responsibility of the family.   He worked hard to pay the bills and help send his younger brother and sister to school, he wanted the best for them.

As a child I lived in the house behind my grandmother, so essentially I had two homes and half the time was spent at each home, sometimes more at grandmother’s.   I remember one day my Dad says to me “You don’t live here at Grandma’s” & I replied “well half the time I do because when you and mom are at work this is my home”  and he could not argue to that. lol

Ah, after a long day at school I’m walking home and hear grandmother’s sweet voice singing Amazing Grace, among other hymns while she is in the kitchen washing dishes and cooking mashed potatoes and hamburger steaks with gravy.  I come in and put my books down and she asks me how my day was and we just talk about everyday things.  My sisters and brother would be there laughing and cutting up, watching TV in the living room, such a simpler time…… Grandma always wanted the best for us, she taught us to put our education first, she did the cooking, cleaning, sewing and so on.  What she taught us was so much more than an education could give, she taught us value in life, value in friendship, value in keeping your word, taking pride in your work and just all around good ethics.  She always told us to treat others the way that we wanted to be treated, to love hard, to pray harder and to NEVER GIVE UP!!

My sister and I used to write songs and sing or try to sing, lol We used to go on about how we were going to be huge singers and make lots of money.  Oh, how I wish that were so….we would perform for the others and have a good ole time.

Every night we would read the bible and say prayers with Grandma before bed.  Sometimes we would get to laughing and talking and she would have to fuss us to go to sleep but, mostly we laughed and talked till we all drifted off to sleep.

She used to tell us stories of her childhood and our parents childhood, mostly giving us lessons in life and you know I don’t even think she realized just what an impact she had on us as we grew up.  She really used to stress that we did not have to take no man beating on us, she always told us that she did because she had no education and she had kids to feed.  She did not depend on welfare or anything like that, she was a very proud woman to say the least.

Well I got married and moved on with life and as time came and went, I would visit grandmother less and less. I used to call her when I got off work at night and we would stay on the phone for hours as I cooked supper and cleaned my house, most of the time we talked til it was time for bed.  Grandmother aged gracefully for a time then, the roles shifted and she needed us to care for her as we discovered she had Alzeimer’s disease.  She could not stay alone any longer so we took turns taking care of her, enjoying her witty personality as much as possible because we knew that each passing day with her was so precious.  We were able to keep her home until she went to be with Jesus, and that was her wish.  We did everything we could to make her comfortable and give her the proper care that she so well deserved.  It was not an easy feat but, God gave us strength to get through it.

Now my husband and I are moving into the house and have discovered some issues of water damage and termites.  He is working so hard to fix what he can with what he has and he wants so bad to make things just right.  He wants me to be safe, happy and to have a good home.  I tell him all the time “It does not have to be perfect, I’m not used to a mansion”.  I’m happy with the simple things in life; love, family, friendship and health.  I do appreciate all the hard work he is doing and I know he does not understand just how much the “house” means to me. I mean I know it was Grandma’s house and I know things change and things have to be done to the house, and I’m fine with that.  It’s just alot to take in all at once.  I’ve lost a lot in my life and I will always cherish the fragrant memories of “The house that built me”

All my love to Grandma Ida, my mom, my dad and my brothers & sisters

Crystal Hoksbergen